Thursday, December 31, 2009

Times a changin...

So, Following the time spent with Family in San Jose for Christmas, etc, I went up to the Russian River with my friend Jennifer and her family. They have a house right on the river. It was coooold (spoiled bay area girl), but so nice to be away from this concrete jungle (Especially after being in Suburbia for a few days. I hate parking lots and strip malls more than i can say). Anyway... We were taking a hike one day in the redwoods- Beautiful, amazing trees and life that I don't get to see too often. now, this may be the itty-bitty hippy in me coming out, but I felt so at peace, so grounded. Connected to my surroundings, yes. But, even more so, actually connected with myself. Finally, all of the BS of the city, and the holidays, and artificial shit in life was stripped away, and I was able to just be. Now, at that exact moment, as I was saying all of this to myself in my head, my fita do Salvador (miracle ribbon from brazil) fell off. I have had this on since my second day in Salvador, Bahia in August 2008. It is something that I have come to notice and acknowledge on a daily basis since then. It became a part of me. As seen in this photo, it became part of everything.



I knew it was going to fall off, but when it actually did, I was completely taken off guard, and shocked. It hurt, I felt winded when I realized what had happened, as I held it in my hands. I thought back to the wishes I had made when I first got the ribbon, and it actually made some sense that it had fallen off when it did. I remember one wish having to do with being happy with me being me and another having to do with travel and adventure. Now, Over this year, I feel that I have done a lot of work in both areas, and am actually really happy with the outcome of both. However, I think that the travel/adventure section is yet to be finished.

Nonetheless, I feel really heartbroken over this. This was my on-going connection to the amazing life and love of Salvador. Yes, i have the tattoo in the same place to have a forever reminder of this amazing place and the amazing experience I had there. But, this was something tangible, fragile, that was still there. It made it seem so close, still. Like, It had just happened and I could still picture it all in my head, so vividly. But, now that it has fallen off a year and a half later, the length in time seems more real. And it hurts. Still. It makes me realize that I can;t keep holding on to something to make it feel like its still there. Rather, if I want it there, I need to make it be there.

Anyway, Happy belated Holiday season to the (non existent) people that browse through this from time to time. I have to say, 2009 was good to me. I'm sad its over, because it means time is moving toooooo fast. And I'm a bit sad I didn't do more during it. but... I did a lot, so I can't complain.

Highlights of '09
-First running race
-New York Trip
-Performing in CubaCaribe
-Pink hair
-Special Olympics
-Bruddy's Purple Heart Ceremony
-Finally trying to learn to Salsa dance
-Fixing my record player!
-Committing to my bicycle
-First Critical Mass
-4th of july at Dolores park!
-Sunbathing at the Russian River
-Yoga
-Learning Spanish
-Couchsurfing through Mexico
-Mexican Rockabilly and mi tatuaje de un calavera de azucar
-Turning 25
-Dancing with Tania Santiago and Aguas Da Bahia
-Tap dancing independently
-Crazy Awesome birthday bash(es)
-Kicking coffee for 2 weeks, then getting right back on it
-Holiday cooking and baking with my niece
-Russian River in the cold
-Me being Me











Thats all I can think of right now. I really can't complain about not doing everything. I did a whoooooole lot. And am happy about all of it.

I will end this by saying that I can't wait for 2010. Its gonna be awesome!!

Another year of adventure, dance, and musical obsessions. On that note...

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